I’ve just found out I’m pregnant. What do I do?
Discover a positive path in unplanned pregnancy, with Fervr's new book 'A Life Already Started'.
A young woman nervously walks into her church. It’s not like last week. She’s feeling a little frightened, vulnerable. Worried that her friends will see her secret written on the expression of her face.
It was fun to have a boyfriend, it wasn’t even very serious. They mainly went out together with all their other friends, exploring this new city. One night though, it wasn’t fun. She was trapped, he was overcome. He pressured her. She gave in. She’d never been with a guy before, now she wonders if she will ever want to again.
Her sickness confirmed her worst fears. She was alone and terrified, sitting slumped on the bathroom floor, staring at a little white strip with two blue lines.
She wonders what she should do next.
A Life Already Started
The scenario above is based on true story, and is a scene played out time and time again. The circumstances women find themselves in vary but they share this in common: women will choose to have an abortion not because they are pro choice but because they feel they have no choice.
Fervr's new book A Life Already Started is all about finding a positive path in unplanned pregnancy. We spoke to Ali Maegraith who contributed the Forward to the new book, about some practical advice for anyone who has discovered they are pregnant, and is looking for help.
Ali's words are below...
Practical advice in unplanned pregnancy
There is no time in life more confusing and isolating than when you discover that you are pregnant, when you never intended or planned to be. Your journey of working through your options and future path will be entirely unique to you. Here are a few ideas that might be helpful for you.
- Take some time out from your normal routine. Write down all your thoughts and feelings. Stop and breathe.
- Find someone to talk to. This may or may not be the father of the child, depending on your relationship. A trusted mature Christian woman will be the best person for most people to start with. Someone who will listen and pray with you. Sometimes families can be helpful and supportive, and for some women, they will be the first people you will turn to for help. For others, it may be better to talk to someone outside your immediate circle first. Get the right people around you. Those who will love you, will walk with you and who you can trust.
- There are Pregnancy Help Centres in every state of Australia (where I live), and similar organisations in other countries. Pregnancy Help Centres have trained pregnancy counsellors who are able to provide objective help. If you find a group that states clearly that they will not refer clients to abortion centres, you can be sure that they will provide a range of services without including the abortion option.
- If you are looking to find information online about help and options, remember that many groups will present abortion as a valid option, so be careful. Many women simply seeking someone objective to talk to have found themselves actually at the abortion facility itself.
- You may never have had to think about issues such as abortion. How do you feel about abortion now? Access some information about what abortion is and the effects that it can have.
- Where do you stand on abortion? You can’t erase past mistakes, but you can make positive decisions for the future. The decision to have an abortion is a final one. Is the memory of an abortion something that you want to keep with you? You may see it now as a quick fix to the problem, but have you considered how your feelings may change later when it’s too late to go back? These are things that many women in the same situation have asked themselves. The Pregnancy Centres already mentioned will give you accurate information about abortion.
- Talking to your church pastor may sound intimidating, but if you belong to a caring church, this is exactly the opportunity for your church to do just that, to care! Your willingness to be open about your pregnancy and pending motherhood will inspire others to not be frightened to share their own struggles. It is also the opportunity for the church to demonstrate grace to each other together. Again, this will depend on your circumstances as to whether this is appropriate or not.
- Take a good look at all the positive options you have before you. If you are young mum, there are organisations designed to inspire motherhood such as ‘the brave foundation’ and ‘the babes project’.
- If you are considering adoption in Australia, then Anglicare Adoption Agency have specialists in this area and they can give you support and information. Adoption is a valid and loving option for many young women facing unplanned pregnancy.
If you would like help in your particular situation, contact Fervr today, and we will direct you to a helpful organisation in your area. To purchase a copy of A Life Already Started, click here.